Children and Teens

It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself. ~Joyce Maynard

First, let me make it clear that I will never recommend psychotropic medication for a child or teen. Our culture has gone wild on these medications and it is a dis-service to our children. What is troubling your child may be any number of things. We all know that it is hard to grow up. Adolesence brings on a whole other set of problems but most of it is completely natural and can be addressed with compassion, understanding, patience and love. The last thing we ought to be doing is attacking our children with drugs. Drugs don't help and in many cases they are very destructive. I love working with kids and teens and have found real success without the help of any drug.

That being said, I believe, the most challenging task in living is parenting. There are no hard and fast rules that work for every age. Just when you think you have a child figured out they change in some basic way. It is impossible to know if you need to be tough or tolerant as each new stage or crisis comes along. In other words there is little wonder that children and parents come to times in their lives and family lives where help is needed.

Treatment of children is much the same as the treatment of individuals and couples. The problems that a child has are clues to what a child needs and what will help a child. The difference is that many times the child may not need treatment only. The whole family unit may need help. Dr. Ives' philosophy in treating children has to do with treating the whole family. The child may be the "identified patient" but help is found not just in his or her resouces and changes but also in the family.

Dr. Ives studied family systems with Edwin Friedman.

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